First week of school is done and over

Harley had a successful week. Only twice a note came home saying he was trying to sleep at school...once he had fallen asleep on the bus (what's strange is that morning he was wide awake getting ready for school!).

They are still in the reviewing stages of work from last year. I am braced for behaviors once they start challenging him, but who knows? Maybe he will surprise me?

We went right back into the 'school year' routine...therapies after school with Creative Perspectives and in-home therapies on the days he doesn't have CP (and Wednesday).

We had our family therapy session with Mike this past week. Only Andrew, the littles and I attended. We discussed how Tyler is beginning to mimic Harley's behaviors more and more and becoming increasingly aggressive. Mike warned us this will most likely get worse before it gets better. Right now Harley & Tyler are at about the same functioning level emotionally and socially - as I've mentioned before Harley's pretty much plateaued at a 4 to 5 year old level on an emotional/social level. He's been at this level for a while, so I have a feeling this is the highest he'll get.

I was discussing his recertification with his in home OT this week. I was asking if she felt he had a short-term memory loss. At first she said no...but as we discussed it she feels that if it's a auditory reminder or request, then yes, he has a memory deficit...So I'm not sure how we are supposed to list that on his recertification - since we are only supposed to list yes or no?

We are starting a 'new' behavior training program here at home for Harley where he earns 'tick marks' for preferred/compliant behaviors and loses them for unpreferred/aggression/non-compliant behavior. It's been working pretty well since Thursday morning...he earns time on my laptop...which really kind of sucks since he plays and navigates the web in such a way it slows my computer down and I am afraid he will click on the wrong thing and get through my virus software:O He's already crashed the computer that DDRC gave him a couple of years back. Hopefully we can figure something else out soon so he has a different computer other than my laptop to use for his reward.

Kelly's first week of school went well...she did her homework, I didn't get any calls that she missed any classes. I think this year will go much better as now we have BIG leverage. She's turning 17 in about 4 weeks and expects to get her drivers license. She's been reminded all summer that she will NOT be getting her license on her 17th birthday because first she needs to prove to me that she can be responsible enough to attend her classes and keep her grades up...besides she doesn't have a vehicle she can drive to/from school, friends around, etc. Right now we are down to one vehicle (my newer van) and I cannot be home without a vehicle more than I already am--besides Andrew needs it to go to work.

Robert's been a challenge. He's been slightly (ok, more than slightly) depressed that he no longer gets to go to school. We DID warn him of this...he's been on a job search but with the economy the way it is it's gonna be a hard, long road and his frustration levels are not the best when it comes to waiting. Voc Rehab is working with him in the hopes that they can find him a placement with the additional supports and accommodations he will need to be successful with his disabilities. His therapist and psychiatrist are still suggesting we apply for SSI disability benefits for him, but I really don't want to give him an easy out to never work...which is the way he will see it if he can sit at home and collect money to be disabled, he would have no desire nor drive to attempt to find work or even volunteer opportunities.

Tyler's new school year has yet to start. He's going to be a 'senior' in preschool this year. They have changed the location of his schooling this year and he will have all new classmates. He usually excels in his school work, I'm just concerned about his behaviors.

Zachary continues to improve on his speech and may or may not qualify for Early Intervention services...it's a tough call at this point according to his speech therapist. He will be evaluated by DDRC in October or November and depending on how he does at that meeting will determine if he begins school in January of 2011 or if he will need to wait and start in September.

We were able to help one family with school supplies this year. No others came forward for help (at least not that I saw). The moderator at the local freecycle started her own private group for helping people and I think she's been denying any requests for that kind of help and referring them to her other group. It's sad because she's made it difficult for people to 'join' her other group if she has a personality conflict with them...so that's really reduced the number of people I can help.

I have a friend who has been struggling putting food on her table and am trying to help her out...but many times she won't take the help. I feel so badly for her and her family. I do not have a LOT of money and cannot help her out with a whole week's full of groceries at a time, but I try to send little things over as I hear she's in need. I wish there was more I could do to help her but I also understand her need to try to find other ways to provide for the needs of herself and her family.

There's many other things I've been working on over the past few weeks and really really want to start updating my blog more often so that I don't have such long posts in the future. I'll try to post more updates on the goings on in our lives in the coming days, but I think I've given everyone a pretty good picture on the things we've been working on this past week.

Hey All!!

I have finally gotten pictures uploaded for the past two weeks. We have been so busy..as typical in the month of May.

For those who know of the struggles we've had in our lives over the past two and a half years, you will be happy to know that I have been so busy enjoying life, enjoying my boys and overcoming the sadness of the recurrent miscarriages we've suffered -- and that is why my blog has been so neglected. I am hoping to be able to get onto and into it more and update more often so come back soon! I sure do miss the ladies I used to talk to on LF BBC, the Angels boards and the December 07 Stocking Stuffers...hopefully some of them feel they have a "vested friendship" with me and continue to visit here occasionally to keep up with what all's been going on.

We are entering new experiences (and challenges) in our lives in the next 12 months or less...with Robert being an "official" adult in that he is no longer in high school and now we must guide him on how to become a 'real man of the working world'....Kelly preparing for her junior year of high school (and us tightening the reins so that she WILL graduate in 2012 like she's supposed to!)....Harley going into transition services with the dawning of the age of 14...Tyler preparing for another year of preschool...with all new classmates since everyone else is 'graduating' into Kindergarten this year...and Zachary...hopefully...yes hopefully....growing and learning how to use the potty as he nears his third birthday...In December I will undergo an MRI to ensure that the tumor has not grown back and I will get a clean bill of health...and maybe by some miracle, we will be chosen as an Extreme Makeover Home Edition family....yes, it promises to be an even more exciting year in the next 12 months than the past 12 have been. And who knows, maybe we will add to our family in this coming year as well...whether it be a cat, dog, bird or baby...

I hope you choose to follow our journey...and occasionally leave me a note so that I know that people are reading here....feel free to leave an anonymous comment (that way you don't have to have a gmail account) -- but PLEASE be sure to sign your comment. There is a link to email me privately and you can always reach me at facebook as well.

Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy your visits via peeking into the windows of our lives through the words of this blog.

I owe UPDATES

Of course I got a TON of pictures from graduation. I still have to upload them to photobucket...but if you want to see them at Facebook (which is easier and faster than uploading them here and that's why they get uploaded there first....) Click HERE

Immediately after graduation, Robert went with his dad to Evergreen (not all the way to Wyoming!)...got $350 in cash and a new laptop of his own. He and Kelly got back this morning about 11:45 just to leave at 12:30 for a graduation party. They returned home at 7:30 and asked to go out with friends again--leaving at 8:00 to go swimming. Kelly was TORQUED that I said the only way she could go is if she could be home by 9:00 since it's a school night. "But ALL my friends are going and it's not my fault I'm not a senior and have school tomorrow"...Irregardless..you have school tomorrow so curfew of 9:00 pm stands...there's only 7 days of school left...Of course she's got an excuse why they can't just have all their fun after she gets off school for summer vacation...all of her friends are going on a road trip (but they don't know how they are paying for it?! Do you really think they're going with no money?! LOL)...

Oh well, the saga of having a teen daughter continues...I really don't remember wanting to be with my friends THIS much at this age!!

Party Pictures

Saturday we celebrated Harley's 13th & Tyler's 4th birthday with friends...


We BBQ'd on our *almost* done deck...(still needs railings and repainted)





Since the party was outside, we couldn't get the candles lit...so we "fake blew out the candles" LOL










And a picture...Andrew, me, my dad and my step mom Linda...first time we've seen my dad since before Harley was born....

Twins?

Tyler and his BFF Becca....they are inseparable...so cute..she's the "older woman"...just so happens she's my BFF's daughter...and my bff...Tricia! is so sweet and helpful, she's been driving Tyler to school every single day for us since my surgery!

Thanks Tricia and I love having you and your family close to us...we'll have to start a commune!!

Pictures...

Robert & his 3 closest friends (and Andrew in the background trying on the 'glasses' at Zac's request)

Also roasted marshmallows:


Group Pic:

A trying week ahead of me

Just a taste of what I've been dealing with the last couple of weeks that has kept me from blogging LOL

I have a difficult week ahead of me and can use all the extra help/thoughts/prayers I can get...

I have a sick toddler (Zac)...fever, cough, sounds awful...leaving me sleep deprived as well so that isn't helping the emotional aspects...

Yesterday Robert was at a friends' house. He suddenly stalked in the door and started slamming stuff around...ends up that the 7yo girl (who he is always been very cool with) started to jump on his back..he told her to stop and she didn't...so he smacked her! (her mom is my bff and had spent the night at my house after a loooong girls' night!)...I just don't know what to do to get through to him...he turns 18 in 3 days...the only thing I see getting through to him is jail time...because he's just not getting it...more on that later...

Today my teens come back after spending 18 hours with my ex husband and his parents. They are always very edgy and tense. I don't know what to do for them. Kelly is sick too...sore throat (and we asked her dad not to make her go since her grandpa is dying of a cancerous brain tumor and shouldn't be exposed to any sicknesses), but he refused.

Monday I have to get a blood draw to find out my cortisol levels now that I am not on the prednisone anymore...My pituitary may have been damaged by the pressure on it over the years or by the surgery. If my levels come back low, I will have to have more testing...and probably hormone replacement therapy (my adrenal gland does not appear to be working correctly). We were still hoping to not try/not prevent for #6...now we don't know where we stand on that...we will talk to the dr after the final results come in.

Also Monday I see the neurosurgeon for follow up...last time he didn't even so much as look at me, just asked a couple of questions and rushed out of the room...so I complained...now his bedside manner sucks even more...when I went to the dr last week I found out that the neurosurgeon didn't even have my neurosurgery input into my medical records!! (it will be 11 weeks tomorrow!) He has released me to drive - but I can't turn my head fast without dizziness so I figure driving is probably not a good thing...

Then Tuesday we have to go to court with Robert about his assault charges from when he jumped a girl at school a couple of weeks ago. I am scared he will have this bad attitude he's been having with us and the judge will slap him hard! He keeps playing this "she deserved it" game...we don't know yet if the parents will be pressing charges or asking for restitution (the girl is a pom and he put her in a headlock and punched her in the head a couple of times, then scratched her on the chest to draw blood). He has disabilities and the school psychologist is planning on being there to explain his 'issues' as well as me taking his medical documentations...but still, I don't want him to get off the hook because of his disabilities...then I feel like a bad parent?!

Wednesday Robert turns 18...I am seriously worried that he will get his ass in a sling and end up in jail for hitting someone or acting inappropriately...I just don't know how to get through to him. I've had him in counseling, but he got discharged because he would clam up and sit and draw the whole time...so it was a waste of the counselor's time. Now that he turns 18 everything changes about who he can see (he has to switch to an adult therapist)--and he has trust issues...what am I supposed to do?

Also Wednesday I have to meet with the new special ed director for Harley's school. He was "at the top of her list" when she took over as the director a few weeks ago...she called a special meeting so that she could ask how we best handle his behaviors and aggressiveness...well he has a behavior plan. I asked if she had met him yet...and she responds with once...I told her he is a different kid in person, much happier and joyous than what's on paper...she responds with "not from what I saw"...I guess the school called her out on her first day during one of his behaviors...so I feel that was so totally unfair as her first impression of him was not so good....

Then Thursday I get to do all the follow up on everything else. I still have to schedule Harley's appointments too...he has been having more problems, more seizures (which are creating the behaviors, but they are abscense (sp?) seizures and the school insists he's NOT having them b/c they expect a seizure to be a falling on the floor flailing around...even though he has a health plan that describes exactly what a seizure looks like for him...

So he has to have an MRI and EEG -- but has to be sedated...he has had a brain cyst since he was a baby and they are concerned that it may have grown some and may have to remove it now. (It's at the base of his skull). He's also been going down hill with his physical attributes and has to start on PT and I still have to find an in home OT for him to replace the one who did the illegal restraint on him.

Speaking of that, we are in the process of working with the State Dept of Health on the investigation to see what actions the state may take against her (we are not filing legal charges b/c we don't want to put Harley through the stress of police/court).

Then next week I have to meet with Harley's state caseworker to ensure he still qualifies for the specialized 24/7 line of sight extensive benefits. I have no doubt but that is so hard on me because I have to focus on all the negatives about him during those meetings...I hate having to do that...It always makes me cry!!

I'm sorry this is so long...you are an amazing friend if you made it this far...

*sigh* My day...

It's been crazy busy today...well the last few days...here's a quick over view while I have it all typed up and I may come back and try to update based on this...I also have a few pictures I'd love to upload but it's hard to get computer time the last few days....

IDK how many read on Facebook that Robert got suspended on Wednesday for getting into a fight with a girl at school. We're looking at 3rd degree assault charges from the preliminary investigation...he's just lucky he's still a minor at this point but UGH what a headache!! I don't know what kind of fine or court proceedings we're gonna have to deal with. My Ex (his dad who desserted him by moving to Wy with 2 weeks notice to him in March?)...has a very I don't care attitude so I just had to take the bull by the horns...IDK what we are going to do for getting him more mental health treatment since he turns 18 in 2 weeks and his dad won't put him on his health insurance and we don't go to mediation (or get any idea of possibly SOME child support) until late March...at the earliest.

Got the investigation on the OT abusing Harley a couple of months ago too (well got my copy of the written investigation)...The OT's side of the story is all twisted and full of lies and could've lead to Harley being considered for out of home placement due to 'being a danger to himself and others' but it backfired on her b/c we have so many other therapists and the school working with him ...and she ended up in trouble because he only acted out agressively on her b/c she didn't follow his behavior plan *whew*

Then I have this drama with this woman over the SantaSwap thing and she also removed all my freecycle memberships so I've been dealing with the main office of freecycle trying to get my moderation privileges (and memberships) reinstated. I swear, she is being so damned childish....

THere is so much more going on but that is what I already had typed up so I just C&P'd it here...I will try to keep up better in the coming days and try to catch up with posts and pics!!

Happy Birthday Song...

Warning: they sound awful, but it's still funny!

Pictures from the Sweet Sixteen Party!

Story to follow...

Just catching up some pics!

Here's the new van we bought:

We got $5,000 off the price because of the hail damage--

Harley did NOT want his picture taken this time, look at that face!! :))


Daddy taught Zac to drink out of the jug!?

And then we talked him into using a big boy cup instead!


HELP! My tongue is on FIRE!

(no it's really just after a popsicle!)

Darien came over on Friday for a BBQ! We have missed him so damned much! He was Harley's respite provider for two years. Now he's a hairdresser. It was so nice to catch up with him! He was so upset that we didn't even call him when Zachary was born...last time we saw him Tyler was about 6 months old!


Last but not least, my beautiful daughter bought a dress yesterday--this is the first time in almost eight years that I've seen her wear a dress! And she let me take pics knowing it would end up on my blog! What a tropper she is!

oh yeah

and I forgot to mention that I also sold my car for $200 to our babysitter...had to drive her over to get her insurance card, then to DMV to get her her own plates because I wasn't about to let her drive with mine...while driving her around, she was telling me about this mutal acquaintance (used to be a friend of mine) that is 23years old, got pregnant at 19 by 'accident' and had triplets...

then got pregnant again when they were 18 months old and had an abortion...

then found a new boyfriend and boom pregnant again 2 months after her abortion...

In the past year, she lost the triplets to a custody battle (over her neglecting them) with her ex-boyfriend's parents...and now the boys live in another state and she doesn't seem to care...she doesn't even attempt to visit them!!

Found a new boyfriend in the past year too AND was pregnant again--with twins...she just lost the twins this past Saturday--she was about 8 weeks along. Her first miscarriage, but I don't know that it really bothers her that much -- after all, she DID have an abortion and it didn't seem to affect her...

I can't say I feel badly for her and I know that probably makes me an awful person --but when I had experienced my first miscarriage she came over on Christmas eve and showed off her pregnant belly and then offered to let me rub it since I "didn't have one to rub anymore"....I haven't spoken to her since then...

And
I didn't get to do my Wii Fit today :( that's such a bummer...but I did get all my housework done...down to the last sock in the laundry!! Since it's nearly 10:30 I am not going to do my Wii Fit today ... It's just too late and I really need to get to bed...I'm up for another long day tomorrow

What's Up??

Amazingly enough the temperature!! It's supposed to be in the 70s here today! Hopefully I can get some pictures of my boy having some fun in the sun!! Have I mentioned how much I hate my backyard? It's been nicknamed "the Tundra" around here...There is sooo much mud out there!! I can't let Zachary crawl around out there...It's bad enough that Tyler comes in covered in mud...Although he doesn't mind having to take baths daily (rather than every other day!)

So housework is gonna fall by the wayside so that we can be outside enjoying this unseasonably warm weather!!

TTC News: Yay for crosshairs!! I was beginning to wonder if it's right but the more I look at it, I'm sure it's right now...so...If you're a chart stalker...compare my current chart with the one from October 2008...so many simiilarities -- even the 'symptoms'...I sure hope Mary Ellen and Anne are right and this is the month of another pregnancy (with my history of getting pregnant every 2-3 months)...Let's hope that this is one of those months -- but with one difference!? A STICKY bfp?!

Oh and I gotta say
CONGRATULATIONS TO MARY ELLEN!!! I knew you were pregnant!! Enjoy your pregnancy! I'll be right there following along!

more stuff

I have much more stuff to blog about but as I break from my chores today, I'll work on those...I was just wondering

Who reads my blog that is from Middletown, NY? Just curious because for a number of years as I was growing up I lived in Middletown NY as well. I think the house we lived in has since been ripped down and turned into a mall, but just wondering!?

Welcome Annie Mae!

Danielle, I had to add a special post for the arrival of your little girl! Congratulations honey!! What a beautiful name!! Give her extra hugs and kisses from me!

JENN!!!

Congrats sweetie!!

Running behind

And couldn't find a song for Wednesday at the last minute, so I'll have to come back and find a song I like for today...

Hoping to get some Christmas shopping in today...not much left to do...

So excited for my friend Nella who's having an ultrasound today!! GOOD LUCK!! Hope you see a heartbeat (or two!!)...

A busy week for the Angels Board!

So many angel mommies celebrating...



one will remain nameless...but YOU know who you are!!

AND

Kristin!!







And JULIE!! You know I'll be thinking of you all day till you report to me the results of your ultrasound...

CRYSTAL!! You get better and hurry home!! So glad that lil' bean is doing well!

Congratulations!

To Julie and Cami on their bfps!!

Julie: you will be holding a beautiful baby again in August--I just know it!

You too Cami...



Nella! I have such a good feeling for you this month too...you so deserve it and have waited far too long!!

Thank you ladies

Your support and kind words have meant the world to me over the last 24 hours. I cannot express how much I appreciate each and everyone of you and thank you from the bottom of my heart...